PHOTO: Derek Fildebrandt, as he sees himself (Photo: Derek Fildebrandt Facebook page).
Gone are the days when Derek Fildebrandt had a party whip to tell him not to say dumb things on social media.
Nope, the former Wildrose and United Conservative Party MLA for Strathmore-Brooks nowadays sits in splendid isolation in the time-out corner of the Legislature, sent down to the hard and narrow Independent benches by UCP Leader Jason Kenney for his many political sins.
The self-styled “liberty conservative” is his own whip now, which means he can pretty well Tweet whatever he pleases and no cooler heads will be around to call him up and advise him kindly to behave himself, and then try to fire him if that doesn’t work out. Dignity, for Mr. Fildebrandt, is apparently not a high priority.
Consider Mr. Fildebrandt’s contribution yesterday to the Twit-o-sphere, apparently in defence of his decision to continue bellowing “in all thy sons command” during the singing of the national anthem …
My national anthem doesn’t change because somebody in Ottawa says so. #ableg https://t.co/0jfYQjqYEq
— Derek Fildebrandt (@Dfildebrandt) April 3, 2018
Still, upon consideration, it occurs to me that perhaps the world would be a happier place if we all had our own personal anthems. The only precondition would have to be, for the preservation of world peace, that no one gets to write their own.
Herewith is my offering for Derek Fildebrandt’s. Of course, since he is the founder of the Reagan-Goldwater Society (Ottawa Chapter), no gender-neutral snowflake from his home town can make him sing from someone else’s song sheet, even if it was duly passed by an act of Parliament.
Just the same, this song can be sung to the tune of O Canada, and has the added advantage, from Mr. Fildebrandt’s perspective, of being All About Derek. He should like it, don’t you think? Maybe we can all chime in at the next opening of the Legislature … Oh, wait! He won’t be there.
O Fildebrandt
O Fildebrandt
Your first and biggest sin
Was when you stood up
And badmouthed Kathleen Wynn!
Air-b-n-b, that parking lot
Where you crashed up your truck
Were bad enough, but when you shot
That deer, you shot your luck …
(Chorus)
O Fildebrandt,
Notorious and free,
They don’t even want you
In the You-See-Pee!
They don’t even want you
In the You-See-Pee!
(Derisive foot stomping and whistles. All exit to parking lot, stage left.)
Well done, Mr. Blogger. Clever lyrics, however, are not enough. You should set up a You Tube video, sing your version of O Fildebrandt, with or without accompaniment, and post it online. If Paul Anka can write and croon his own stuff, why not you?
Derek will love ya even more.
Oh David Climenhaga
You made my day!
(sung to the tune of the last two lines of “Oh Canada”)
The idea of a personal anthem reminds me of my kids’ favourite movie quote:
“We all have our own personal El Guapos . . . ” (Three Amigos)